My three girls, Lambkins the dog, and the two cats Marigold and Magic, co-exist peacefully most of the time. Lambkins has grown to 22 LB and has a beautiful coat for winter. She has a cute way of going into the bottom part of the kitty condo and sleeping in there. When she gets hair cuts, it looks like the perfect size for her. But now that her hair has grown back it was so cute last night, because all you saw was one ear with curly white hair hanging out the hole.
Marigold now trusts Lambkins so completely, that if Lambkins is in the office chair and Marigold wants to go from her table to my table, she will just walk right on the chair almost walking on top of her. It is good to see that.
Magic is still Magic, whiny, demanding, sweet. She won't walk on the chair if Lambkins is laying on it, but she is building. trust with the dog.
Tamar Mag Raine
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Helpful Hints #3 Pipe Cleaners and Satin Underpants
Pipe cleaners and Satin underpants
This is the third set of helpful hints for those with disabilities
I had always had trouble opening and closing plastic bags with twist ties, but now my fine finger ability has declined, so one day, I got the bright idea to use pipe cleaners instead of those really short plastic twist ties. It works great. You can find pipe cleaners in the arts and crafts section of your big CVS or art supply store, as well as, of course, where pipes and tobacco are sold.
Pipe cleaners also come in handy for cleaning the caps of my plastic bottles. You know the kind with the pop up spout. If you don’t clean those spouts, it can become black and yucky tasting. I also have my helpers boil the caps to ensure I don’t get sick, or add to my dental woes.
I have worn leggings for many years; my issue has always been they are difficult to pill up and down over cotton underpants. Recently, I realized my underpants were all worn out, so I went on a mini shopping spree and bought many different types of underpants. Among those that fit, were some satiny types of underpants. I was pleasantly surprised when I went to the bathroom one day, and it was so easy to pull my leggings down, and then it was easy to pull them back up. I wasn’t struggling to pull them up, nor was I struggling to keep my balance. So, when I wear leggings, I now wear my smooth, satiny underpants.
These are not earth-shattering hints, but every small thing that can help people be a little more independent is worth sharing.
Tamar Mag Raine
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
It's the 20th Anniversary of the Americans with Disabilities Act, Our Homes, not Nursing Homes!
This Monday, marked the 20th anniversary of the ADA, which President George H. Bush signed into law. It was a hard fought battle, and it wasn't clear how long it would take to implement it into reality. It's now 2010, and our struggles to become full-fledged members of society has borne some fruit. And yet many people are still struggling with the most basic needs. Let's begin with the ones I know the best; The struggle in California to keep the in-home supportive services for the elderly, and younger people with disabilities: The IHSS budget takes less than 1.5 percent of the entire budget, and yet, Arnold Schwarzenegger has sought to cut the program from the first day he took office, long before the economic downturn. He also went after the Regional Centers which provide additional support for those with developmental disabilities like cerebral palsy, autism, Down Syndrome. These cuts would have meant that THOUSANDS would either end up in nursing homes, or being endangered in their own homes, or becoming homeless. And that does not take into account the home care workers who provide individualized support for all the people on the rolls. Last year the Governor was set to cut 90% of IHSS consumers off the rolls. That would have meant that over 300,000 care providers would lost their jobs! And that would mean they would need to apply for unemployment, if not they would have ended up becoming homeless!
Not only that, but Governor S. tried to criminalize the disabled and the elderly by requiring us to be fingerprinted and photographed by roving social workers in vans with specialty cameras being used to fight the drug war on American borders, and being used by the military in Afghanistan and Iraq. Those cameras cost $5,000 each! The total bill would be $40 million! Yes folks! The state is so broke we can't afford to pay the In-home care providers, but we can afford $40 million to "root out those wicked" consumers ripping off the system or whatever numbers his highness comes up with. You'll have to pardon the sarcasm!
Bear in mind there is no evidence at all to support the outrageous claims! After all, the consumer isn't the one getting paid! As my friend and fellow advocate, Maggie Dee noted in a recent posting, it doesn't make any sense. The social workers at each IHSS office, have a mind-boggling caseload. In the 1990s, I asked my social worker about her caseload. She told me she had over 900 consumers! I imagine it must number in the thousands now. As Maggie asked, do you really think they're going to inspect each time sheet for each consumer for matching fingerprints? Are they going to train each payroll clerk to read fingerprints? Talk about a witch hunt!
Another issue is the lack of beds in nursing homes! IF A.S. were to be successful, the State, is not prepared in any way to put any large numbers of people in nursing homes. Thank goodness for small truths like this.
Oh WAIT! Here's a nice kicker; A.S. gave the nursing home industry MILLIONS of dollars to build more nursing homes! When I heard this last summer, I was absolutely LIVID! Again; he was trying to get rid of us. It's a well known fact that nursing homes cost much more per person than paying for in-home care! The Terminator does not care one bit about us. He only cares about big business. The emperor wears no clothes and he has no heart. He also has no understanding of what the Supreme court Olmstead decision is about. We are not sick. We just need assistance, usually non-medical assistance. Nursing homes are always understaffed and do little in the way of keeping "patients" busy and happy. Why should somebody languish in a nursing home when they could and should be able to have a life with family, friends and choices like everybody else!
I honestly do not think our Governor cares about the hundred thousand he wants to cut. I say; If he really cared, if any of the politicians really cared; if they had the will, they would find a way. So far we have had to fight every step of the way to keep services. Thankfully, the legislature has rejected the $40 Million to use those cameras, saying that they never approved photographing or fingerprinting the IHSS consumers. So far so good, but we always have to pay close attention.
I'll tell you what I'd like to see; instead of looking at short-term goals and taking from the neediest citizens, I'd like to see a gathering of activists and people in many fields, finally coming up with long-term solutions to the many issues we face. That is what we were doing in Berkeley on that traffic strip. For four weeks my comrades kept a presence at this encampment called Arnieville. I will be so glad when A.S. leaves office. Just seeing his name causes me to feel nausea! I imagine that Meg Whitman will be no better.
Not only that, but Governor S. tried to criminalize the disabled and the elderly by requiring us to be fingerprinted and photographed by roving social workers in vans with specialty cameras being used to fight the drug war on American borders, and being used by the military in Afghanistan and Iraq. Those cameras cost $5,000 each! The total bill would be $40 million! Yes folks! The state is so broke we can't afford to pay the In-home care providers, but we can afford $40 million to "root out those wicked" consumers ripping off the system or whatever numbers his highness comes up with. You'll have to pardon the sarcasm!
Bear in mind there is no evidence at all to support the outrageous claims! After all, the consumer isn't the one getting paid! As my friend and fellow advocate, Maggie Dee noted in a recent posting, it doesn't make any sense. The social workers at each IHSS office, have a mind-boggling caseload. In the 1990s, I asked my social worker about her caseload. She told me she had over 900 consumers! I imagine it must number in the thousands now. As Maggie asked, do you really think they're going to inspect each time sheet for each consumer for matching fingerprints? Are they going to train each payroll clerk to read fingerprints? Talk about a witch hunt!
Another issue is the lack of beds in nursing homes! IF A.S. were to be successful, the State, is not prepared in any way to put any large numbers of people in nursing homes. Thank goodness for small truths like this.
Oh WAIT! Here's a nice kicker; A.S. gave the nursing home industry MILLIONS of dollars to build more nursing homes! When I heard this last summer, I was absolutely LIVID! Again; he was trying to get rid of us. It's a well known fact that nursing homes cost much more per person than paying for in-home care! The Terminator does not care one bit about us. He only cares about big business. The emperor wears no clothes and he has no heart. He also has no understanding of what the Supreme court Olmstead decision is about. We are not sick. We just need assistance, usually non-medical assistance. Nursing homes are always understaffed and do little in the way of keeping "patients" busy and happy. Why should somebody languish in a nursing home when they could and should be able to have a life with family, friends and choices like everybody else!
I honestly do not think our Governor cares about the hundred thousand he wants to cut. I say; If he really cared, if any of the politicians really cared; if they had the will, they would find a way. So far we have had to fight every step of the way to keep services. Thankfully, the legislature has rejected the $40 Million to use those cameras, saying that they never approved photographing or fingerprinting the IHSS consumers. So far so good, but we always have to pay close attention.
I'll tell you what I'd like to see; instead of looking at short-term goals and taking from the neediest citizens, I'd like to see a gathering of activists and people in many fields, finally coming up with long-term solutions to the many issues we face. That is what we were doing in Berkeley on that traffic strip. For four weeks my comrades kept a presence at this encampment called Arnieville. I will be so glad when A.S. leaves office. Just seeing his name causes me to feel nausea! I imagine that Meg Whitman will be no better.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
A CALL TO ACTION!
I received this in an email. I am posting it in its entirety. This is why I have no faith in politicians of any stripe.
An Open Letter from ADAPT to the Disability Community on the 20th Anniversary
of the Signing of the Americans with Disabilities Act
Sisters and Brothers in the Disability Community:
As the 20th anniversary of the signing of the Americans with Disabilities Act
draws near, we approach the milestone with mixed emotions. Securing national
civil rights legislation, protecting the rights of people with disabilities,
was truly historic. It is important that we recognize the incredible nature
of this accomplishment and the hard work of those that made this happen, but
20 years after President George H. W. Bush signed this civil rights
legislation into law and as our community is preparing for the celebrations,
we pause in disappointment that the promise of freedom has still not reached
our sisters and brothers in nursing facilities and other institutions.
Our sisters and brothers remain locked away, unseen and unheard. For them,
the act is just words on paper. They are not given the opportunity to
exercise their civil rights under this law because they still do not have the
basic freedoms that other Americans enjoy.
As the Anniversary date draws closer, they may hear about the progress our
community has made over the past 20 years, but knowing that you are protected
against discrimination in employment means nothing when the hub of your life
is a bedroom you share with a stranger. Knowing that buildings and public
accommodations are accessible means nothing when the facility staff won't let
you leave; and even having access to lifts on buses - as dear to our hearts as
that is - means nothing when you cannot afford to go anywhere on the allowance
that is left over after the institution has taken its share of your money.
When we gather together as a community, we must remember that our sisters and
brothers in institutions will not be toasting those that authored or advocated
for the Act. They will not be celebrating independent living, either as a
movement or personal achievement, and they certainly won't share in the power
or pride of the disability community. For them, July 26th will be the same as
every other day in the institution.
Recently, ADAPT has been criticized by some of the provider-based advocates in
our community because we are publicly demanding that Speaker Pelosi sign onto
the Community Choice Act and agree to eliminate the institutional bias once
and for all. They tell us that publicly questioning "our friends" is
inappropriate. We are told we should be grateful for the efforts that have
been made so far, and that we must be patient because change takes time.
We will not apologize for our impatience. We do this because our brothers and
sisters have waited long enough for their freedom. We cannot sit by,
patiently and quietly waiting for our government to give our people the
freedom which should be our birthright.
We had great hopes for President Obama and this Congress. Many of us believed
that his promise for change included the promise of freedom. When President
Obama was taking the oath of office with his hand on Lincoln's bible, it
seemed like fate was telling us that he would free our people. When the
President and Congress took up health care reform, we were sure that they
would finally eliminate the institutional bias, and we hoped that this
historic anniversary in the disability community would be celebrated with
historic change. Unfortunately, the President and Congress did not have the
political will to make this happen. While we recognize that some gains were
made, unlike any other class of Americans, our freedom remains a state
option.
It is, indeed, true that one of the tools we are using to help people leave
institutions and move into the community is the Supreme Court's Olmstead
decision, which is based on the requirements of the ADA, and it is true that
President Obama's administration has demonstrated an unprecedented commitment
to enforcing the Olmstead decision. But such efforts are transitory. We have
seen, during the last 20 years, that new administrations have their own
priorities, and although there may now be a commitment to enforce the Olmstead
decision, the pendulum will ultimately swing back in the other direction. We
also know that the gains we may make in the courts are hard-fought, slow, and
constantly subject to attack. Even right now, as many in the disability
community commemorate the ADA's anniversary, the Attorney General in
Connecticut is coordinating legal efforts by the states to fight against some
of the recent gains we have made in court which will allow more of our people
to live in freedom. Ironically, the deadline for states to join the effort is
just one day after the anniversary, July 27th.
In America, freedom shouldn't ever be optional, but - in fact - for us it is.
While federal Medicaid rules require states to pay for institutional
placement, community-based alternatives are state options and continually
subject to elimination in state budget cuts. It is ironic that as we
celebrate a civil rights victory that is 20 years old, our freedom is becoming
even more precarious and the situation becoming more dire. States, facing
record budget shortfalls, are cutting the services that support community
living options for seniors and persons with disabilities. These budget cuts
force people into unwanted placement, stealing from them much of what is most
precious: their homes, their families and their freedom.
Some people have moved across the country to a different state to get supports
and services to live outside of the institution. There, they have been able
to share in the promise of the ADA, but many people don't know about the
services available in other states or simply might not be able to make the
journey on this modern underground railroad.
But as long as community services are only an option, those who have escaped
to freedom cannot escape the fear. No place is safe because their freedom can
easily disappear at the whim of state policy makers. They will be called upon
to help solve their state's budget crisis by sacrificing their freedom, home
and lives.
We all need to recognize that through personal circumstance or state policy
change any of us can lose our freedom. No one in our community is exempt. No
one is safe. No one in our community can afford to be comfortable, but it is
also our hope that - from this discomfort - the disability community will be
mobilized to take action and, together, we will build on a 20-year legacy to
address this injustice. Our movement isn't about the civil rights for some of
us; it is about the freedom of all of us.
We cannot wait any longer. ADAPT asks you, during this ADA 20th anniversary
celebration, to recommit your energy to ending the institutional bias during
the next Congress. The time is now to end the institutional bias and FREE OUR
PEOPLE!
Sincerely,
The ADAPT Community
NATIONAL ADAPT MAILING LIST - Adapt Community Choice Act List http://www.adapt.org
An Open Letter from ADAPT to the Disability Community on the 20th Anniversary
of the Signing of the Americans with Disabilities Act
Sisters and Brothers in the Disability Community:
As the 20th anniversary of the signing of the Americans with Disabilities Act
draws near, we approach the milestone with mixed emotions. Securing national
civil rights legislation, protecting the rights of people with disabilities,
was truly historic. It is important that we recognize the incredible nature
of this accomplishment and the hard work of those that made this happen, but
20 years after President George H. W. Bush signed this civil rights
legislation into law and as our community is preparing for the celebrations,
we pause in disappointment that the promise of freedom has still not reached
our sisters and brothers in nursing facilities and other institutions.
Our sisters and brothers remain locked away, unseen and unheard. For them,
the act is just words on paper. They are not given the opportunity to
exercise their civil rights under this law because they still do not have the
basic freedoms that other Americans enjoy.
As the Anniversary date draws closer, they may hear about the progress our
community has made over the past 20 years, but knowing that you are protected
against discrimination in employment means nothing when the hub of your life
is a bedroom you share with a stranger. Knowing that buildings and public
accommodations are accessible means nothing when the facility staff won't let
you leave; and even having access to lifts on buses - as dear to our hearts as
that is - means nothing when you cannot afford to go anywhere on the allowance
that is left over after the institution has taken its share of your money.
When we gather together as a community, we must remember that our sisters and
brothers in institutions will not be toasting those that authored or advocated
for the Act. They will not be celebrating independent living, either as a
movement or personal achievement, and they certainly won't share in the power
or pride of the disability community. For them, July 26th will be the same as
every other day in the institution.
Recently, ADAPT has been criticized by some of the provider-based advocates in
our community because we are publicly demanding that Speaker Pelosi sign onto
the Community Choice Act and agree to eliminate the institutional bias once
and for all. They tell us that publicly questioning "our friends" is
inappropriate. We are told we should be grateful for the efforts that have
been made so far, and that we must be patient because change takes time.
We will not apologize for our impatience. We do this because our brothers and
sisters have waited long enough for their freedom. We cannot sit by,
patiently and quietly waiting for our government to give our people the
freedom which should be our birthright.
We had great hopes for President Obama and this Congress. Many of us believed
that his promise for change included the promise of freedom. When President
Obama was taking the oath of office with his hand on Lincoln's bible, it
seemed like fate was telling us that he would free our people. When the
President and Congress took up health care reform, we were sure that they
would finally eliminate the institutional bias, and we hoped that this
historic anniversary in the disability community would be celebrated with
historic change. Unfortunately, the President and Congress did not have the
political will to make this happen. While we recognize that some gains were
made, unlike any other class of Americans, our freedom remains a state
option.
It is, indeed, true that one of the tools we are using to help people leave
institutions and move into the community is the Supreme Court's Olmstead
decision, which is based on the requirements of the ADA, and it is true that
President Obama's administration has demonstrated an unprecedented commitment
to enforcing the Olmstead decision. But such efforts are transitory. We have
seen, during the last 20 years, that new administrations have their own
priorities, and although there may now be a commitment to enforce the Olmstead
decision, the pendulum will ultimately swing back in the other direction. We
also know that the gains we may make in the courts are hard-fought, slow, and
constantly subject to attack. Even right now, as many in the disability
community commemorate the ADA's anniversary, the Attorney General in
Connecticut is coordinating legal efforts by the states to fight against some
of the recent gains we have made in court which will allow more of our people
to live in freedom. Ironically, the deadline for states to join the effort is
just one day after the anniversary, July 27th.
In America, freedom shouldn't ever be optional, but - in fact - for us it is.
While federal Medicaid rules require states to pay for institutional
placement, community-based alternatives are state options and continually
subject to elimination in state budget cuts. It is ironic that as we
celebrate a civil rights victory that is 20 years old, our freedom is becoming
even more precarious and the situation becoming more dire. States, facing
record budget shortfalls, are cutting the services that support community
living options for seniors and persons with disabilities. These budget cuts
force people into unwanted placement, stealing from them much of what is most
precious: their homes, their families and their freedom.
Some people have moved across the country to a different state to get supports
and services to live outside of the institution. There, they have been able
to share in the promise of the ADA, but many people don't know about the
services available in other states or simply might not be able to make the
journey on this modern underground railroad.
But as long as community services are only an option, those who have escaped
to freedom cannot escape the fear. No place is safe because their freedom can
easily disappear at the whim of state policy makers. They will be called upon
to help solve their state's budget crisis by sacrificing their freedom, home
and lives.
We all need to recognize that through personal circumstance or state policy
change any of us can lose our freedom. No one in our community is exempt. No
one is safe. No one in our community can afford to be comfortable, but it is
also our hope that - from this discomfort - the disability community will be
mobilized to take action and, together, we will build on a 20-year legacy to
address this injustice. Our movement isn't about the civil rights for some of
us; it is about the freedom of all of us.
We cannot wait any longer. ADAPT asks you, during this ADA 20th anniversary
celebration, to recommit your energy to ending the institutional bias during
the next Congress. The time is now to end the institutional bias and FREE OUR
PEOPLE!
Sincerely,
The ADAPT Community
NATIONAL ADAPT MAILING LIST - Adapt Community Choice Act List http://www.adapt.org
Friday, July 16, 2010
California Governor wants to terminate 116,000 jobs
The governor is holding firm on his plan to slash $750 million (that will be from 116,000 workers LOSING their JOBS,) in funding from In-Home Supportive Services, the program that helps seniors and disabled Californians stay safely at home -- and out of expensive nursing or medical institutions. Will you call your state representatives and tell them that you won't stand for such inhumane and uneconomical abuses.
Call Your Reps Now (toll-free): 1-866-699-9243
Call Your Reps Now (toll-free): 1-866-699-9243
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
From Hoovervile To Arnievile?
For the past six days, members of the East Bay disability community have been camped out on a street divider in Berkeley. We are trying to garner support and wake people up to the ugly things going on in Sacramento. Please think hard before saying, "Well there are two million people who are unemployed in California, times are hard for everybody." I'm saying WAIT, because there have been continued cut-backs for the past decade.
Our lives now hang in the balance, with almost NO Medi-cal services for adults! With severely disabled people who have successfully been living independently in their own homes or apartments, with the support of their in-home support service providers, do you think it's right to say, "Well, you have to go live in a nursing home?" You know it would not be right.
The politicians also know it is not right. They have proven they do not care. The Nursing Home Industry has already benefited, our Stinking asinine governor, made a move last summer that filled me with rage. He gave them millions of dollars to make more beds available for the thousands of people that are going to undoubtedly lose their In-Home Support Services due to the cuts!!!
This, after stating that IHSS takes so much of the budget in California. Yet he gives millions to the Nursing Home Industry. But even those millions would not come close to preparing the massive numbers of beds that would be needed. The IHSS budget is 1.5% of the entire California budget.
It has been things like this that make me despise the Governor more than any other politician in recent times. BUT let me be very clear! It isn't just this governor, it is the legislators on both sides who voted for this budget. Last summer when we demonstrated in the hallway to the governor's offices, many Democrats came to talk with us, and said, "We are behind you; keep up the good fight!" Many of those, had photo ops with the demonstrators, but all but one went and voted against us. I was so angry, that I didn't feel like our demonstrations were getting through. Yes, I also spoke while the budget committee was hearing testimony, in addition to getting arrested twice, and taking part in other protests. I had to stop protesting and gather my energy. And I have spent 5 hours on that strip in the cold wind, holding signs and waving. But I cannot gather the energy to spend the night or sit in the rain when what we are doing, doesn't seem to be getting through to the folks that can sign our lives away!
What many people refuse to think about, is that we are you; we could be your mother, father, grandmother, brother sister, aunt, uncle, or your children and friends. Disability does not discriminate! It comes to us all. I have a friend in a nursing home, the only things she can do is watch TV and listen to books on CD or tape. I hate seeing her in that place! This is a UC Berkeley Grad who for seven years volunteered at a school and helped second graders learn to read and do math. She was also a writer and performer. Does she belong in that place? No. She has a severe disability, and could not get enough support after her mother died. She lost her job and then her mom, and then lost her roommate after the roommate graduated. Her Regional Center and Supported Living agency failed her. She was sent first to live in a group home, and I'm not sure why she ended up in a nursing home, but as you might guess, it made her already severe depression much worse. I know there are thousands of people like my friend, who COULD contribute SO MUCH to society if they had the physical support in place.
I have noticed the deafening silence on the Berkeley Disabled listserv, I think, like me, many of my comrades are depressed and terrified and that leads us to inaction, and just worrying a lot about who is going to get us out of bed in the morning, who will bathe us, dress us, cook for us, and feed us, and who will help us go to the bathroom throughout the day. How can we make plans when we are the poor? Many will have no options.
And yet Arnold Schwarzenegger wants to treat us like criminals! He wants to spend 5 BILLION dollars on high tech cameras that are used by the military and on the U.S. borders. He could provide over 500 people on IHSS with services for a year. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND his logic. One can get a full background check on a person receiving services, or a worker for a lot less. There are places on the Internet that allows people to get as many reports as they want for $40.00 a month. But that is not the point. The point is that the governor, wants to cut 90 percent from the IHSS! Ninety percent! He wants social workers to grade our disabilities on a scale that is highly inadequate, and many, like me have mixed needs that the scale simply can't grade or take into account. Please ask your legislators to cancel this grading system! If anybody grades us, it should be qualified Occupational Therapists!
One last point and I will get off the soapbox! In-Home Supportive Services, accounts for ONLY 1.5 percent of the entire budget! Read that again! ONE point Five percent! Yet it's always been the first thing that this governor wants to cut! The poor the elderly, the disabled are seen as fat to be trimmed EVERY STINKING YEAR! I AM SICK OF IT! Please help! Stop THIS GENOCIDE! FOR IT Will BE GENOCIDE IF ALL THESE CUTS GO THROUGH! Even though the state is in dire straits, Arnold has refused to raise taxes of any kind. The wealthy are not losing medical benefits, they go on living like kings, they own four houses and four cars. THEY SHOULD PAY THEIR FAIR SHARE!!! They get so many tax breaks it makes me sick. They are not "sharing the pain". Besides, 35 million people live in this State, and it makes me wonder how many ARE Employed?
Tamar Raine
Our lives now hang in the balance, with almost NO Medi-cal services for adults! With severely disabled people who have successfully been living independently in their own homes or apartments, with the support of their in-home support service providers, do you think it's right to say, "Well, you have to go live in a nursing home?" You know it would not be right.
The politicians also know it is not right. They have proven they do not care. The Nursing Home Industry has already benefited, our Stinking asinine governor, made a move last summer that filled me with rage. He gave them millions of dollars to make more beds available for the thousands of people that are going to undoubtedly lose their In-Home Support Services due to the cuts!!!
This, after stating that IHSS takes so much of the budget in California. Yet he gives millions to the Nursing Home Industry. But even those millions would not come close to preparing the massive numbers of beds that would be needed. The IHSS budget is 1.5% of the entire California budget.
It has been things like this that make me despise the Governor more than any other politician in recent times. BUT let me be very clear! It isn't just this governor, it is the legislators on both sides who voted for this budget. Last summer when we demonstrated in the hallway to the governor's offices, many Democrats came to talk with us, and said, "We are behind you; keep up the good fight!" Many of those, had photo ops with the demonstrators, but all but one went and voted against us. I was so angry, that I didn't feel like our demonstrations were getting through. Yes, I also spoke while the budget committee was hearing testimony, in addition to getting arrested twice, and taking part in other protests. I had to stop protesting and gather my energy. And I have spent 5 hours on that strip in the cold wind, holding signs and waving. But I cannot gather the energy to spend the night or sit in the rain when what we are doing, doesn't seem to be getting through to the folks that can sign our lives away!
What many people refuse to think about, is that we are you; we could be your mother, father, grandmother, brother sister, aunt, uncle, or your children and friends. Disability does not discriminate! It comes to us all. I have a friend in a nursing home, the only things she can do is watch TV and listen to books on CD or tape. I hate seeing her in that place! This is a UC Berkeley Grad who for seven years volunteered at a school and helped second graders learn to read and do math. She was also a writer and performer. Does she belong in that place? No. She has a severe disability, and could not get enough support after her mother died. She lost her job and then her mom, and then lost her roommate after the roommate graduated. Her Regional Center and Supported Living agency failed her. She was sent first to live in a group home, and I'm not sure why she ended up in a nursing home, but as you might guess, it made her already severe depression much worse. I know there are thousands of people like my friend, who COULD contribute SO MUCH to society if they had the physical support in place.
I have noticed the deafening silence on the Berkeley Disabled listserv, I think, like me, many of my comrades are depressed and terrified and that leads us to inaction, and just worrying a lot about who is going to get us out of bed in the morning, who will bathe us, dress us, cook for us, and feed us, and who will help us go to the bathroom throughout the day. How can we make plans when we are the poor? Many will have no options.
And yet Arnold Schwarzenegger wants to treat us like criminals! He wants to spend 5 BILLION dollars on high tech cameras that are used by the military and on the U.S. borders. He could provide over 500 people on IHSS with services for a year. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND his logic. One can get a full background check on a person receiving services, or a worker for a lot less. There are places on the Internet that allows people to get as many reports as they want for $40.00 a month. But that is not the point. The point is that the governor, wants to cut 90 percent from the IHSS! Ninety percent! He wants social workers to grade our disabilities on a scale that is highly inadequate, and many, like me have mixed needs that the scale simply can't grade or take into account. Please ask your legislators to cancel this grading system! If anybody grades us, it should be qualified Occupational Therapists!
One last point and I will get off the soapbox! In-Home Supportive Services, accounts for ONLY 1.5 percent of the entire budget! Read that again! ONE point Five percent! Yet it's always been the first thing that this governor wants to cut! The poor the elderly, the disabled are seen as fat to be trimmed EVERY STINKING YEAR! I AM SICK OF IT! Please help! Stop THIS GENOCIDE! FOR IT Will BE GENOCIDE IF ALL THESE CUTS GO THROUGH! Even though the state is in dire straits, Arnold has refused to raise taxes of any kind. The wealthy are not losing medical benefits, they go on living like kings, they own four houses and four cars. THEY SHOULD PAY THEIR FAIR SHARE!!! They get so many tax breaks it makes me sick. They are not "sharing the pain". Besides, 35 million people live in this State, and it makes me wonder how many ARE Employed?
Tamar Raine
Thursday, May 20, 2010
We need More Cute shoes in size 11 Wide!
The apprael and shoe market do not market to those of us with a larger bone structure. Instead I have to go to certain stores in the Bay Area, where various national stores do have clothing and shoes for women with "full figures".
What the heck? My feet don't seem that much bigger, it's just that my ankles are swollen. And I do already have certain types of shoes I can't wear. Wedge shoes for instance, My sense of balance is poor, so I can't wear wedges or stilettos, and if I ever did were those, I'd probably end up in the ER with a broken ankle. You might be curious since I am in a wheelchair, why I couldn't wear those. Because if I have to get in or out of the car, or go to the bathroom, I need to be able to make the transfer. When I tried to find a pair of good looking shoes that would be appropriate for a black-tie wedding, I could not find any locally that were even close to what I needed. It seems that once a style like wedges has been introduced in one type of shoe, the industry proceeds to make wedges in ALL of its product line.
I remember in the 70s when wedges were popular, and I begged my mother for a pair, she said "only if you can balance in them," because in those days I pretty much walked everywhere. We finally found a pair of wedge platforms where the wedge was across the entire sole.
My feet have grown as I've aged, my arches were never high, but now they've fallen. I cannot possibly be the only woman in Oakland wearing a size 11 2E! It's not like I can starve and diet my feet down to a 9 M. Real women need as much a selection in clothing and footwear as skinny girls with no curves have available!
So after two dismal days of looking locally, I took my search online. Even the stores for large ladies didn't have a lot of choices for those of us who can't wear wedges. Nevertheless, I ordered four pair from two places, hopefully at least one pair will be suitable and fit me correctly.
As far as clothing goes, it never ceases to annoy me that stores don't have much, if any selection beyond an 18-W and that if I am to find clothes that fir my larger frame, I have to find it only at certain select stores, or go online to the larger ladies catalogs. You see I am not FAT. ost of the tops at these places are too big for me, so I have to order tops from still another store. Even if I were really overweight, why shouldn't I be able to pop into a store locally and have something other than sweats and big shirts available? This is just a refusal on the part of the stores, designers and manufacturers to acknowledge that there is a whole range of sizes that they should be providing and promoting.
I have been thin most of my life, usually 130 LB and a size 12, but I was NEVER a size 9. I will NOT purchase shoes that are too small and narrow. I now weigh about 165 lb. Where are the clothes?
Stores, designers, and manufacturers should acknowledge that people who are overweight, or have larger bone structures and larger feet need and want to have the same opportunities to look cute, and beautiful as our skinnier friends!
Tamar Raine
What the heck? My feet don't seem that much bigger, it's just that my ankles are swollen. And I do already have certain types of shoes I can't wear. Wedge shoes for instance, My sense of balance is poor, so I can't wear wedges or stilettos, and if I ever did were those, I'd probably end up in the ER with a broken ankle. You might be curious since I am in a wheelchair, why I couldn't wear those. Because if I have to get in or out of the car, or go to the bathroom, I need to be able to make the transfer. When I tried to find a pair of good looking shoes that would be appropriate for a black-tie wedding, I could not find any locally that were even close to what I needed. It seems that once a style like wedges has been introduced in one type of shoe, the industry proceeds to make wedges in ALL of its product line.
I remember in the 70s when wedges were popular, and I begged my mother for a pair, she said "only if you can balance in them," because in those days I pretty much walked everywhere. We finally found a pair of wedge platforms where the wedge was across the entire sole.
My feet have grown as I've aged, my arches were never high, but now they've fallen. I cannot possibly be the only woman in Oakland wearing a size 11 2E! It's not like I can starve and diet my feet down to a 9 M. Real women need as much a selection in clothing and footwear as skinny girls with no curves have available!
So after two dismal days of looking locally, I took my search online. Even the stores for large ladies didn't have a lot of choices for those of us who can't wear wedges. Nevertheless, I ordered four pair from two places, hopefully at least one pair will be suitable and fit me correctly.
As far as clothing goes, it never ceases to annoy me that stores don't have much, if any selection beyond an 18-W and that if I am to find clothes that fir my larger frame, I have to find it only at certain select stores, or go online to the larger ladies catalogs. You see I am not FAT. ost of the tops at these places are too big for me, so I have to order tops from still another store. Even if I were really overweight, why shouldn't I be able to pop into a store locally and have something other than sweats and big shirts available? This is just a refusal on the part of the stores, designers and manufacturers to acknowledge that there is a whole range of sizes that they should be providing and promoting.
I have been thin most of my life, usually 130 LB and a size 12, but I was NEVER a size 9. I will NOT purchase shoes that are too small and narrow. I now weigh about 165 lb. Where are the clothes?
Stores, designers, and manufacturers should acknowledge that people who are overweight, or have larger bone structures and larger feet need and want to have the same opportunities to look cute, and beautiful as our skinnier friends!
Tamar Raine
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Mother's Day
When I think about my mother, it is with conflicting emotions. I still hear her critisms in my head every day. everything. "turn your arm the other way", "pick up your feet," and the #1... "TRY TO RELAX!" "for God's sake Tamar!" Oh hell's bells! Oh shit! jezzle pizzle. For pete's sake! and on it goes......... "try harder!!" there was seldom praise.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
An Update On My Furry Critters
The little white dog I brought home the week before Thanksgiving has settled in nicely. She is very much loved by me and all my assistants and everybody who meets her. Lambkin only wants to be right at my side in the house, and loves it when I'm able to take her for a walk. She loves walking and running, and would do so for many hours a day if she had the chance. As it is, she goes on four walks a day. If it's not raining, my assistants and I, and several neighbors walk her a minimum of 1.5 hours per day. At first I was trying to do most of it, but it takes me half an hour to put on sweater, scarf, jacket, and get her leash on... Not great for early mornings when she really has to GO. In addition I was having a lot of pain in my arm from driving my chair too much. We tried for four weeks to get her to use one of those pet pee patches of fake grass, but she refused it. So then we had to figure out a schedule and keep her on it.
I do take her out once a day myself, and I just love it! We tool around the neighborhood with me on my powerchair, driving the chair with one hand, and holding Lambkin's leash in my right hand. At my side I carry a fantastic pooper scooper, which works great! It is called a Scooper Genie. It has a telescoping part that you can extend and retract to make it longer or shorter and has a place where you insert the bag. After the dog has pooped, you find a trash can, lean it over the can, and push the button.
She no longer chases the cats, and when she barks too much Marigold will go up to her and swat her on the nose! Just like Cesar Millan always points out that cats are no fools! Likewise the cats mostly no longer go running in front of Lambkin. And as I had envisioned that day I brought her home, she and Marigold who have similar personalities; gentle, sweet, loving... both will get on the couch near one another, and today when I woke up both Lambkin and Marigold were on the bed with me. Magic has yet to join us. A week ago, we noticed that Marigold was reclaiming my bedroom which she likes because it's quiet, cozy and soft. I was so happy to see this, as I want all my girls to be happy.
Each one has her own way of showing affection to me. Marigold rubs her head on my head or arm when I'm on the couch, Magic wants to be in my lap 24/7, and Lambkin stays as close as she can get, and loves giving kisses.
Three weeks ago, we took Lambkin to a dog park in Walnut Creek, where we met my assistant's husband who brought their young dog, and who has met Lambkin before and now the two are great buddies. With the exception of one minor snapping incident which occurred when we first arrived there, Lambkin has done amazing at these dog parks! Off leash she is just amazing; she loves meeting other dogs, even much bigger males, whereas on-leash she growls sometimes. She is great about always coming back to us after dashing off to meet another dog, or go after somebody else's ball, or even just running for the sheer joy of letting loose. She'll come dashing back to us, and then go tearing off again. She has a wonderful way of loping through the grass that makes me wish I had a video camera. She'll get up on the benches to give kisses to elderly people. We all love the dog park at Pt. Isabel, it is in a beautiful locale so it's super nice for the people too.
We had some concerns for a while when she was having bowel trouble. After feeding her chicken and rice for a few days, she got better, but after resuming her regular food, she got loose stools again. this happened several times, and on a hunch, I looked at the ingredients in her food, and was horrified when I saw that corn meal gluten was the second-most thing in this "premium natural" dry dog food. I now feed her food that has no corn or corn meal gluten, or soy or other typical fillers. She has had no more issues with her bowels.
My three assistants got together to give me the gift of having Lambkin go to a professional groomer. I was so happy! The only thing I did not like was she left too much hair on her face, as I love looking at her face and eyes. We will find a way.
It is SO hard to believe that Modesto Animal Services was going to euthanize her, but after learning of the dismal outlook for dogs in Sacramento county, I am SO HAPPY that Lambkin was saved by Animal Savers! She just brings me so much joy!
Stay Tuned!
I do take her out once a day myself, and I just love it! We tool around the neighborhood with me on my powerchair, driving the chair with one hand, and holding Lambkin's leash in my right hand. At my side I carry a fantastic pooper scooper, which works great! It is called a Scooper Genie. It has a telescoping part that you can extend and retract to make it longer or shorter and has a place where you insert the bag. After the dog has pooped, you find a trash can, lean it over the can, and push the button.
She no longer chases the cats, and when she barks too much Marigold will go up to her and swat her on the nose! Just like Cesar Millan always points out that cats are no fools! Likewise the cats mostly no longer go running in front of Lambkin. And as I had envisioned that day I brought her home, she and Marigold who have similar personalities; gentle, sweet, loving... both will get on the couch near one another, and today when I woke up both Lambkin and Marigold were on the bed with me. Magic has yet to join us. A week ago, we noticed that Marigold was reclaiming my bedroom which she likes because it's quiet, cozy and soft. I was so happy to see this, as I want all my girls to be happy.
Each one has her own way of showing affection to me. Marigold rubs her head on my head or arm when I'm on the couch, Magic wants to be in my lap 24/7, and Lambkin stays as close as she can get, and loves giving kisses.
Three weeks ago, we took Lambkin to a dog park in Walnut Creek, where we met my assistant's husband who brought their young dog, and who has met Lambkin before and now the two are great buddies. With the exception of one minor snapping incident which occurred when we first arrived there, Lambkin has done amazing at these dog parks! Off leash she is just amazing; she loves meeting other dogs, even much bigger males, whereas on-leash she growls sometimes. She is great about always coming back to us after dashing off to meet another dog, or go after somebody else's ball, or even just running for the sheer joy of letting loose. She'll come dashing back to us, and then go tearing off again. She has a wonderful way of loping through the grass that makes me wish I had a video camera. She'll get up on the benches to give kisses to elderly people. We all love the dog park at Pt. Isabel, it is in a beautiful locale so it's super nice for the people too.
We had some concerns for a while when she was having bowel trouble. After feeding her chicken and rice for a few days, she got better, but after resuming her regular food, she got loose stools again. this happened several times, and on a hunch, I looked at the ingredients in her food, and was horrified when I saw that corn meal gluten was the second-most thing in this "premium natural" dry dog food. I now feed her food that has no corn or corn meal gluten, or soy or other typical fillers. She has had no more issues with her bowels.
My three assistants got together to give me the gift of having Lambkin go to a professional groomer. I was so happy! The only thing I did not like was she left too much hair on her face, as I love looking at her face and eyes. We will find a way.
It is SO hard to believe that Modesto Animal Services was going to euthanize her, but after learning of the dismal outlook for dogs in Sacramento county, I am SO HAPPY that Lambkin was saved by Animal Savers! She just brings me so much joy!
Stay Tuned!
An Unexpected Blessing
I have been having difficulty with the seat of my power chair for some time now. Just after I had my first hip replaced, I received a new cushion that had been ordered prior to my surgery. And therein lies the problem or at least part of it. I was away in hospital and rehab centers for about a month, using my manual chair while there. That cushion on my manual chair also leaves a lot to be desired; it's okay for short shopping trips and doctors appointments, but I have had the same seat, since I inherited the manual chair from a cousin's mother in 1987! So I had forgotten what a good chair cushion should feel like when I finally was able to get home and sit on my new cushion. Oh the joys of gel on a sore rear end! However as time went on, I realized that my rear end was not fitting the indentation properly. I theorize that my new hip made my behind wider, since I was always needing to stand up and mush the gel around. I tried calling the chair place, but the company had been sold, and I was told they no longer accepted medi-cal. So in between trying to figure out what to do about it, and attend water-therapy for my hip, as well as looking for a home to buy, and finding a condo, and moving in to it,time marched on.
In October 2009, I had my other hip replaced, and if I wasn't fitting my chair before, now it was even worse, plus I am pretty sure the gel sack had broken. Anyway it had become torture to sit on the cushion with much wider or fuller hips. The chair place came by with a new cushion, but as it was only two inches thick, I knew my body would get even sorer when I go out in the neighborhood, so I refused it. In March I saw a doctor who said it would take five days to send a referral to be evaluated for a new seating system. Well, five days turned into 25 days. I even saw my regular doctor who I really like, and regularly refer to other people with disabilities because he really listens. He said he would fax it over to the PT at the hospital. Well, it took him a little longer than a week, but I see what probably happened. He had to have somebody look up all the codes for my many spine issues, (which are depressing to read!)
But, I didn't know how much longer it would take to get the referral, and then to get into see the PT at the rehab center, so after my Feldenkrais lesson on Monday, I was determined to give my rear-end a break, and went to the Foam Factory, to look at getting a temporary solution. So, I asked the guy to show me some memory foam. I was hoping that an 18 X 18 inch piece would be priced so I could afford it. He said it would be $57.00. I was not surprised, but I was not happy either. I asked him if he had anything cheaper. He said, yeah, but they won't feel the same.
Another customer had overheard my conversation with my assistant and the employee, about how I didn't know how much longer it would take my doctor, and he said to me, "I'd like to buy it for you." I was very surprised, I didn't quite know what to think. He was a very nice-looking man, stocky, African American, with a nice smile. Then I recalled several other instances where strangers wanted to give me something, and my dad, who was a psychologist had told me to accept their gifts because it makes people feel good to give. So, I said, "Are you sure?" He smiled and said yes. So, I came home with a lovely piece of memory foam, which is fine for around the house, but because it sinks, not enough by itself for when I go for walks.
My mail yesterday contained that referral, so today my assistant took it to the rehab center and I have an appointment in May sometime. Needless to say, I'm glad I have the memory foam, and look forward to paying the gift forward, in some way. After I get a new cushion for my power chair, I'll use the foam for my manual chair.
Thank you, kindly, sir!
April 20, 2010
In October 2009, I had my other hip replaced, and if I wasn't fitting my chair before, now it was even worse, plus I am pretty sure the gel sack had broken. Anyway it had become torture to sit on the cushion with much wider or fuller hips. The chair place came by with a new cushion, but as it was only two inches thick, I knew my body would get even sorer when I go out in the neighborhood, so I refused it. In March I saw a doctor who said it would take five days to send a referral to be evaluated for a new seating system. Well, five days turned into 25 days. I even saw my regular doctor who I really like, and regularly refer to other people with disabilities because he really listens. He said he would fax it over to the PT at the hospital. Well, it took him a little longer than a week, but I see what probably happened. He had to have somebody look up all the codes for my many spine issues, (which are depressing to read!)
But, I didn't know how much longer it would take to get the referral, and then to get into see the PT at the rehab center, so after my Feldenkrais lesson on Monday, I was determined to give my rear-end a break, and went to the Foam Factory, to look at getting a temporary solution. So, I asked the guy to show me some memory foam. I was hoping that an 18 X 18 inch piece would be priced so I could afford it. He said it would be $57.00. I was not surprised, but I was not happy either. I asked him if he had anything cheaper. He said, yeah, but they won't feel the same.
Another customer had overheard my conversation with my assistant and the employee, about how I didn't know how much longer it would take my doctor, and he said to me, "I'd like to buy it for you." I was very surprised, I didn't quite know what to think. He was a very nice-looking man, stocky, African American, with a nice smile. Then I recalled several other instances where strangers wanted to give me something, and my dad, who was a psychologist had told me to accept their gifts because it makes people feel good to give. So, I said, "Are you sure?" He smiled and said yes. So, I came home with a lovely piece of memory foam, which is fine for around the house, but because it sinks, not enough by itself for when I go for walks.
My mail yesterday contained that referral, so today my assistant took it to the rehab center and I have an appointment in May sometime. Needless to say, I'm glad I have the memory foam, and look forward to paying the gift forward, in some way. After I get a new cushion for my power chair, I'll use the foam for my manual chair.
Thank you, kindly, sir!
April 20, 2010
Sunday, April 18, 2010
little poem found in my notebook
Wherever you go,
Wherever you are,
Whatever you do,
I'll be dreaming
and thinking of you.
Tamar Raine 4-2010
Wherever you are,
Whatever you do,
I'll be dreaming
and thinking of you.
Tamar Raine 4-2010
Friday, April 2, 2010
On The Wings of Love (poem)
The Wings of Love
by
Tamar Mag Raine
I listened to an old song today,
It opened the doors to my heart,
And a few other memories came
Flying in on the wings of love.
Is love ever really
Gone from our lives?
Or do we just forget
It’s within us always,
Waiting to be remembered,
Waiting to be shared
With every being in the universe
Ohhhh the wings of love and grace;
Once upon a time,
I was given a most miraculous vision,
On the wings of love and grace,
I was shown in no uncertain terms,
That love springs eternally,
From deep within us all,
Love never leaves us,
And is unfathomably deep,
Deep as the universe itself,
Deeper than the oceans,
Love just poured forth,
From deep within my heart and soul,
No words can describe the intensity
Of the love that was springing up
On the wings of love and grace,
On the wings of love and grace,
In meditation one early morning,
I found a small boy,
apparently abandoned,
And as I sat talking quietly to him,
The love within me starting flowing;
Indescribable – overwhelming,
Warm, gushing sensation;
Deeper than the oceans,
Deeper than the universe;
Yes my child,
You will walk in grace forever,
You will fly through life in joy,
On the wings of love and grace,
For they never end, love never ends,
Oh my sweet child, oh my dear child,
Keep your heart wide open,
Let your love flow,
Even when you get hurt,
Just remember from where
The source of love springs,
And let the wings of love
And grace carry you,
And you can live a
Life of joyous love,
On the wings of love and grace,
Yes life can be hard,
The body can be frail,
But nothing can extinguish
The fire of love;
Once you feel this truth for yourself,
You will live a joyous life,
Even if you get overwhelmed or sick,
And even if somebody hurts you,
Just sit peacefully, sit peacefully,
And remember the wings
Of love and grace.
Just remember, just remember,
Yes, just remember who you really are,
And that you can live on
The wings of love and grace…
(I was inspired by John Denver's song Perhaps Love)
If you, or somebody you know can sing and play music, I'd love to get together and turn my words into a song...
by
Tamar Mag Raine
I listened to an old song today,
It opened the doors to my heart,
And a few other memories came
Flying in on the wings of love.
Is love ever really
Gone from our lives?
Or do we just forget
It’s within us always,
Waiting to be remembered,
Waiting to be shared
With every being in the universe
Ohhhh the wings of love and grace;
Once upon a time,
I was given a most miraculous vision,
On the wings of love and grace,
I was shown in no uncertain terms,
That love springs eternally,
From deep within us all,
Love never leaves us,
And is unfathomably deep,
Deep as the universe itself,
Deeper than the oceans,
Love just poured forth,
From deep within my heart and soul,
No words can describe the intensity
Of the love that was springing up
On the wings of love and grace,
On the wings of love and grace,
In meditation one early morning,
I found a small boy,
apparently abandoned,
And as I sat talking quietly to him,
The love within me starting flowing;
Indescribable – overwhelming,
Warm, gushing sensation;
Deeper than the oceans,
Deeper than the universe;
Yes my child,
You will walk in grace forever,
You will fly through life in joy,
On the wings of love and grace,
For they never end, love never ends,
Oh my sweet child, oh my dear child,
Keep your heart wide open,
Let your love flow,
Even when you get hurt,
Just remember from where
The source of love springs,
And let the wings of love
And grace carry you,
And you can live a
Life of joyous love,
On the wings of love and grace,
Yes life can be hard,
The body can be frail,
But nothing can extinguish
The fire of love;
Once you feel this truth for yourself,
You will live a joyous life,
Even if you get overwhelmed or sick,
And even if somebody hurts you,
Just sit peacefully, sit peacefully,
And remember the wings
Of love and grace.
Just remember, just remember,
Yes, just remember who you really are,
And that you can live on
The wings of love and grace…
(I was inspired by John Denver's song Perhaps Love)
If you, or somebody you know can sing and play music, I'd love to get together and turn my words into a song...
Thursday, April 1, 2010
A Great Internet Radio program!
If you want to start your week in a great mood, then on Mondays, tune into
THIS IS LIFE, an internet radio show featuring Geri Jewell (from Deadwood and Facts of Life), who now also is a motivational speaker, Kathy Buckley, a wonderful deaf comedienne and motivational speaker, and Toby Forrest! These are very thoughtful and fun speakers. Do not miss!
I have been out of commission for two week,s but am planning an article, so stay tuned!
THIS IS LIFE, an internet radio show featuring Geri Jewell (from Deadwood and Facts of Life), who now also is a motivational speaker, Kathy Buckley, a wonderful deaf comedienne and motivational speaker, and Toby Forrest! These are very thoughtful and fun speakers. Do not miss!
I have been out of commission for two week,s but am planning an article, so stay tuned!
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Things Nobody Ever Told You
Every year, beginning when I turned one year old, and my sister, then four, chastised our mother for not wanting to make a birthday for me, our mother made a big thing out of each of our birthdays, especially knowing that our father had to make his own birthday cake at age seven. She was wonderful at organizing and decorating for birthdays as well as all the holidays; Thanksgiving, Passover, Chanukkah, Washington's birthday, Valentine's Day. I was thinking that if she had been watching some of today's TV shows, she would have gone into business as a party organizer!
Mom passed away in 1992. I was 32 years old. Part of me was glad she had passed, because our relationship had been somewhat stormy, due to her critical nature and explosive temper. As a daughter, I was glad she was no longer in pain. Without her negativity around, my Feldenkrais teacher and I noticed that my healing was zipping along at a pace that was almost shocking. But as the holidays came and went, it began to dawn on me that the birthdays and holidays were no longer something I looked forward to.
My dad passed in 2007, and as we were very close, it was my most dreaded day when along with my cousin, I made the decision to turn off the life support, knowing that he did not want to be kept alive if he were not conscious. The past three birthdays and holiday seasons, have been times of depression for me. Daddy was a sweet man, kind to a fault, and I miss him terribly. I may have his spirit around me always, but the security, the wisdom, the quirky sense of humor, are no longer there for me to lean against in times of sadness and stress. Nobody ever prepares you for celebrating birthdays and holidays without dad or mom. Nobody tells you that the week before your birthday, or even your parent's birthdays, you will feel unassailably sad even though you don't know why. That's why it helps me to have an assistant who also lost her mom at a young age. She reminds me of that, and truly understands what it's like.
Tamar Mag Raine
Mom passed away in 1992. I was 32 years old. Part of me was glad she had passed, because our relationship had been somewhat stormy, due to her critical nature and explosive temper. As a daughter, I was glad she was no longer in pain. Without her negativity around, my Feldenkrais teacher and I noticed that my healing was zipping along at a pace that was almost shocking. But as the holidays came and went, it began to dawn on me that the birthdays and holidays were no longer something I looked forward to.
My dad passed in 2007, and as we were very close, it was my most dreaded day when along with my cousin, I made the decision to turn off the life support, knowing that he did not want to be kept alive if he were not conscious. The past three birthdays and holiday seasons, have been times of depression for me. Daddy was a sweet man, kind to a fault, and I miss him terribly. I may have his spirit around me always, but the security, the wisdom, the quirky sense of humor, are no longer there for me to lean against in times of sadness and stress. Nobody ever prepares you for celebrating birthdays and holidays without dad or mom. Nobody tells you that the week before your birthday, or even your parent's birthdays, you will feel unassailably sad even though you don't know why. That's why it helps me to have an assistant who also lost her mom at a young age. She reminds me of that, and truly understands what it's like.
Tamar Mag Raine
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
THE REAL SOURCE OF WASTE IN CALIF!
THIS KIND OF CRAP IS unspeakably stupid. It denigrates us --> the elderly, and people with disabilities as a class of people without rights, who could be defrauding the system. This Governor has had it in for us from day one! Long before 2 million Californians lost their jobs! You know, I should run for Governor, if for no other reason than to rebut this kind of wastefulness! Arnie wants to buy $5,000 cameras, (yeah you read that right, each one would cost $5,000!!!) such as they use in Iraq and border patrol between Mexico and the states that border it. A more common sense approach would be to use both the cameras and fingerprinting equipment located at DMV! That is IF it were really proven that there is fraud above 2 percent, which I doubt! Anyway, please read on!!! FOLLOW THE $$ TRAIL. I bet anything it's kickback. Gee whiz!
For Immediate Release Contact: Steve Mehlman
UDW Homecare Providers Union
916-804-2569 (cell)
Deborah Doctor
Disability Rights California
510/928-1768 (cell)
STATE PLANS TO SPEND MILLIONS TO PHOTOGRAPH IHSS CONSUMERS DESPITE LACK OF AUTHORITY OR PROOF OF WIDESPREAD FRAUD
Sacramento (March 17) -- Without any authority from the Legislature, the Schwarzenegger Administration is planning to purchase up to $5 million worth of military/security cameras to take pictures of the 450,000 seniors and people with disabilities who receive In Home Supportive Services (IHSS) homecare.
Last year, the Legislature approved the administration’s proposal that county social workers must fingerprint all IHSS consumers as part of a so-called anti-fraud initiative. However, the Legislature neither discussed nor approved photographing consumers. Nor has the administration provided any evidence of how much fraud would be stopped by photographing and fingerprinting these consumers; all IHSS consumers must be visited and assessed at home by county social workers before being approved for the program.
The “MorphoTrak” cameras are currently being used in Iraq and other military locations. According to their manufacturer, they are also recommended for, among other things, “border crossings, gang enforcement, and airport/maritime security.” The camera itself costs $4,200, plus hundreds of dollars more for docking stations and other equipment.
http://www.morpho. com/MorphoTrak/ MorphoTrak/ mt_products. html. Each $5,000 used to buy a “MorphoTrak” camera would purchase nearly 500 hours of IHSS homecare.
Herb Mayer, 79 year old IHSS consumer, chair of the IHSS coalition and a Korean war veteran, said “My social worker knows who I am without needing a $5,000 camera. How can the administration find money for these cameras but no money to keep the IHSS program going?”
The Administration has projected that it will need to purchase 600 to 1,000 of these cameras, costing between $3 million and $5 million. It has borrowed several of these devices from the manufacturer and has solicited Sacramento and San Diego Counties to use them in a pilot project beginning April 1. The District Attorneys in these two counties have been among the strongest proponents of the administration’s anti-fraud campaign. However, a recent report from Sacramento County found a total of only 19 potential cases of IHSS fraud out of 20,365 consumers.
Assemblymember Hector De La Torre (D- South Gate) said: “I am outraged that this administration is again targeting our lowest income seniors and people with disabilities as if they were criminals we need to monitor. How is that we can afford millions for cameras yet we continue to cut their services and the money they live on?”
"The Administration' s proposal to spend $5 million on cameras is ridiculous," said Assemblymember Dave Jones (D-Sacramento) . "The money for each $5,000 camera could instead be used for 500 hours of IHSS care. The Administration has asked Sacramento County to begin a pilot program with loaner cameras on April 1. I am calling on Sacramento District Attorney Jan Scully not to participate in this misguided program."
Assemblyman Alberto Torrico (D-Fremont) states: ”I understand the budget crisis - and I understand that there will be no savings which begin to outweigh the cost of these cameras. When social workers are being laid off and poor elderly Californians are going without services which keep them safe, how can this administration even be considering buying $5,000 cameras?”
“The Governor has once again proposed diverting money from this valuable and cost-effective program”, says Senator Leland Yee (D-San Francisco/San Mateo). “In addition to his years of budget cuts and criminalizing IHSS workers and their clients, this year he proposes to spend scarce public funds on military-style cameras. I will continue to oppose all reductions to IHSS, especially those which deviate from the core mission of providing life-saving assistance to our vulnerable populations.”
"This Administration' s misguided attack on alleged fraud in the IHSS program has already caused major disruptions to IHSS services for 450,000 elderly Californians who depend on these services," said Senator Mark Leno (D-San Francisco). "The small investment in home support for the elderly keeps consumers out of expensive nursing homes and saves the state money. We intend to use our legislative oversight power to ensure the Governor does not waste government resources and harm elderly Californians who desperately need In Home Support Services."
For Immediate Release Contact: Steve Mehlman
UDW Homecare Providers Union
916-804-2569 (cell)
Deborah Doctor
Disability Rights California
510/928-1768 (cell)
STATE PLANS TO SPEND MILLIONS TO PHOTOGRAPH IHSS CONSUMERS DESPITE LACK OF AUTHORITY OR PROOF OF WIDESPREAD FRAUD
Sacramento (March 17) -- Without any authority from the Legislature, the Schwarzenegger Administration is planning to purchase up to $5 million worth of military/security cameras to take pictures of the 450,000 seniors and people with disabilities who receive In Home Supportive Services (IHSS) homecare.
Last year, the Legislature approved the administration’s proposal that county social workers must fingerprint all IHSS consumers as part of a so-called anti-fraud initiative. However, the Legislature neither discussed nor approved photographing consumers. Nor has the administration provided any evidence of how much fraud would be stopped by photographing and fingerprinting these consumers; all IHSS consumers must be visited and assessed at home by county social workers before being approved for the program.
The “MorphoTrak” cameras are currently being used in Iraq and other military locations. According to their manufacturer, they are also recommended for, among other things, “border crossings, gang enforcement, and airport/maritime security.” The camera itself costs $4,200, plus hundreds of dollars more for docking stations and other equipment.
http://www.morpho. com/MorphoTrak/ MorphoTrak/ mt_products. html. Each $5,000 used to buy a “MorphoTrak” camera would purchase nearly 500 hours of IHSS homecare.
Herb Mayer, 79 year old IHSS consumer, chair of the IHSS coalition and a Korean war veteran, said “My social worker knows who I am without needing a $5,000 camera. How can the administration find money for these cameras but no money to keep the IHSS program going?”
The Administration has projected that it will need to purchase 600 to 1,000 of these cameras, costing between $3 million and $5 million. It has borrowed several of these devices from the manufacturer and has solicited Sacramento and San Diego Counties to use them in a pilot project beginning April 1. The District Attorneys in these two counties have been among the strongest proponents of the administration’s anti-fraud campaign. However, a recent report from Sacramento County found a total of only 19 potential cases of IHSS fraud out of 20,365 consumers.
Assemblymember Hector De La Torre (D- South Gate) said: “I am outraged that this administration is again targeting our lowest income seniors and people with disabilities as if they were criminals we need to monitor. How is that we can afford millions for cameras yet we continue to cut their services and the money they live on?”
"The Administration' s proposal to spend $5 million on cameras is ridiculous," said Assemblymember Dave Jones (D-Sacramento) . "The money for each $5,000 camera could instead be used for 500 hours of IHSS care. The Administration has asked Sacramento County to begin a pilot program with loaner cameras on April 1. I am calling on Sacramento District Attorney Jan Scully not to participate in this misguided program."
Assemblyman Alberto Torrico (D-Fremont) states: ”I understand the budget crisis - and I understand that there will be no savings which begin to outweigh the cost of these cameras. When social workers are being laid off and poor elderly Californians are going without services which keep them safe, how can this administration even be considering buying $5,000 cameras?”
“The Governor has once again proposed diverting money from this valuable and cost-effective program”, says Senator Leland Yee (D-San Francisco/San Mateo). “In addition to his years of budget cuts and criminalizing IHSS workers and their clients, this year he proposes to spend scarce public funds on military-style cameras. I will continue to oppose all reductions to IHSS, especially those which deviate from the core mission of providing life-saving assistance to our vulnerable populations.”
"This Administration' s misguided attack on alleged fraud in the IHSS program has already caused major disruptions to IHSS services for 450,000 elderly Californians who depend on these services," said Senator Mark Leno (D-San Francisco). "The small investment in home support for the elderly keeps consumers out of expensive nursing homes and saves the state money. We intend to use our legislative oversight power to ensure the Governor does not waste government resources and harm elderly Californians who desperately need In Home Support Services."
Thursday, March 11, 2010
The WINTER PARALYMPIC GAMES IN CANADA
For the past two Olympic and Paralympic games, NBC has hardly mentioned the thousand or so ATHLETES with disabilities, which greatly infuriated me as well as many other PWD. I, for one, want to see these athletes in the sports section, instead of human-interest stories. I want to see what is possible when one has a dream to follow. NBC lost. Period. I refused to watch the able-bodied Olympics. Shrug, couldn't care less. Yawn, not interested. I wish some other US network would pick up the paralympics, so I don't have to watch it on my 17 inch monitor. HOW about it, ESPN? Surely these athletes would pull in more viewers than say, Poker?!
Anyway, for those interested, Here is the info on how to view the games:
Whistler, Canada - The official Internet channel of the International Paralympic Committee (IPC), ParalympicSport.TV, will be the best source for Canadians to get live coverage of the Opening Ceremony of the Vancouver 2010 Paralympic Winter Games.
Taking place on 12 March, the Opening Ceremony of the Paralympic Winter Games will be officially opened by Her Excellency the Right Honourable Michaelle Jean, Governor General of Canada, and promises to be a world-class celebration that will capture the unique spirit and heritage of Canada and the Host Region of the Games as well as show the amazing spirit of Paralympic athletes and great Canadians. More than 4,000 volunteer performers including dancers, singers, acrobats, athletes, and musicians will celebrate the compelling achievements of 506 athletes from more than 40 countries around the world at the Winter Paralympics in Vancouver.
At the end of the Opening Ceremony, the lighting of the Paralympic Cauldron will signal the official start of the Games and the end of the 10-day Vancouver 2010 Paralympic Torch Relay, which began on 3 March in Ottawa.
Rightsholders ZDF from Germany, SBS from Korea, TVE from Spain, France 2 from France and Sky New Zealand will also offer a live broadcast of the Opening Ceremony, whereas RTR (Russia), NRK (Norway) and NTU (Ukraine) will have a delayed coverage on 13 March. Canada's CTV will be broadcasting the Opening Ceremony the following day on 13 March at 14:00ET. NBC (USA) and ABC (Australia) will show highlights of the event.
Approximately two hours after the Opening Ceremony ends, the coverage will be available as Video on Demand (VOD) on ParalympicSport.TV for those who will not be able to watch it live.
ParalympicSport.TV will broadcast from the Vancouver 2010 Paralympic Winter Games everyday from 12-21 March 2010. All Paralympic sports will be covered in the programming, either live or delayed. This coverage will also be made available as Video on Demand (VOD) after the events on www.ParalympicSport.TV.
Become a fan on Facebook of ParalympicSport.TV at www.facebook.com/ParalympicSport.TV and stay up to date with the happenings in Vancouver and Whistler.
Get the full ParalympicSport.TV schedule and download the attachced pdf document.
For more information about the Vancouver 2010 Paralympic Winter Games, please visit www.vancouver2010.com.
Anyway, for those interested, Here is the info on how to view the games:
Whistler, Canada - The official Internet channel of the International Paralympic Committee (IPC), ParalympicSport.TV, will be the best source for Canadians to get live coverage of the Opening Ceremony of the Vancouver 2010 Paralympic Winter Games.
Taking place on 12 March, the Opening Ceremony of the Paralympic Winter Games will be officially opened by Her Excellency the Right Honourable Michaelle Jean, Governor General of Canada, and promises to be a world-class celebration that will capture the unique spirit and heritage of Canada and the Host Region of the Games as well as show the amazing spirit of Paralympic athletes and great Canadians. More than 4,000 volunteer performers including dancers, singers, acrobats, athletes, and musicians will celebrate the compelling achievements of 506 athletes from more than 40 countries around the world at the Winter Paralympics in Vancouver.
At the end of the Opening Ceremony, the lighting of the Paralympic Cauldron will signal the official start of the Games and the end of the 10-day Vancouver 2010 Paralympic Torch Relay, which began on 3 March in Ottawa.
Rightsholders ZDF from Germany, SBS from Korea, TVE from Spain, France 2 from France and Sky New Zealand will also offer a live broadcast of the Opening Ceremony, whereas RTR (Russia), NRK (Norway) and NTU (Ukraine) will have a delayed coverage on 13 March. Canada's CTV will be broadcasting the Opening Ceremony the following day on 13 March at 14:00ET. NBC (USA) and ABC (Australia) will show highlights of the event.
Approximately two hours after the Opening Ceremony ends, the coverage will be available as Video on Demand (VOD) on ParalympicSport.TV for those who will not be able to watch it live.
ParalympicSport.TV will broadcast from the Vancouver 2010 Paralympic Winter Games everyday from 12-21 March 2010. All Paralympic sports will be covered in the programming, either live or delayed. This coverage will also be made available as Video on Demand (VOD) after the events on www.ParalympicSport.TV.
Become a fan on Facebook of ParalympicSport.TV at www.facebook.com/ParalympicSport.TV and stay up to date with the happenings in Vancouver and Whistler.
Get the full ParalympicSport.TV schedule and download the attachced pdf document.
For more information about the Vancouver 2010 Paralympic Winter Games, please visit www.vancouver2010.com.
Doctors Are Not Gods
I absolutely go nuts when I hear that doctors and other "professionals" give babies labels and sentences! They scare the heck out of bewildered parents, telling them their baby will only live to be a teenager. They tell parents their babies are severely disabled, and they can never achieve anything. But EXPERTS can be wrong and OFTEN ARE! Each child is an individual, and may just need more time to develop than what is considered to be "normal".
I can speak directly from experience of one instance, when I was in 4th or 5th grade; I wanted to learn to play the piano, And when my mother mentioned this to the OT (occupational therapist) the OT said; "Oh, don't waste your money, she won't be able to do it". My mom bristled and said, "Well, Lisa wants to try, so that's what we will do!" So, over the summer, I took lessons, and practiced a lot. My teacher was a woman who had taught blind people to play by having them put their hands on top of hers, to learn how it should feel and look. It worked with me as well, and by the time school began in September, that OT had to eat her words! I was now able to move eight fingers independently and rapidly learned to type on an old IBM using most of my fingers. These days, I use fewer fingers for greater speed and accuracy.
It was the same when I wanted to take horseback riding lessons. This was back in the 60s, before it was widely known that horse riding could improve a child's sense of balance, self-confidence and improve the gait of kids with cerebral palsy. I just knew I loved horses. I had every book I could get my hands on; I loved Black Beauty, I loved all the other stories too. One day the horse I rode got hungry, and broke from a trot, which I was just beginning to learn, into a gallop! I hung on for dear life, as Betsy made her way back to the stables where she launched into her feed bag. My instructor was not far behind. My rear end hurt for a few days after, but by the next Sunday I was ready to go again.
I was also interested in Girl Scouts, because my mom was a life-long scout, and my sister was in a troop. I became a Brownie, and my mom and several other moms were co-leaders. I had a pretty bad scissors gait, and my speech was very poor, but that never stopped me from fully participating in my girl scout troop. I became a girl scoot several years later, and I eventually passed my older sister in the number of badges I earned. I earned fifteen plus the sign of the arrow and sign of the star. There were only two that they had to modify for me; Hiking and Swimming. Instead of doing a full hike, I walked 1/4 of the way. For Swimming, I only had to do two full lengths in a pool with just my mom and Pat Burch my wonderful Irish leader.
Pat knew I wanted to go roller skating, so one day, she came over and put me in all kinds of pillows, and she put skates on me and helped me skate the whole way around my neighborhood. I was elated! I didn't care that I was wrapped in pillows, I was having fun!
BUT there was a time, that made me so mad I cried for days... It was halloween and the troop was going to go to a haunted house, and the people there wouldn't let me go because they were afraid I'd fall and hurt myself. I think that was the first time I actually experienced closed doors, or discrimination by adults first-hand. I wailed for days. My mom understood why I was crying, but hated it and wanted me to stop. She had endured my screams when I was a very sick infant for the first 6 or 7 months of my life.
Despite being a girl scout, I always felt lonely because I was bused to a school for kids with disabilities, so I did not interact very much with the girls in my troop outside of scouts, with the exception of a little girl named Dodie. She was just a wee little thing, yet she tried on my leg braces several times, which were way big on her. I wonder now, what she told her family of me... I know my mom tried to keep me busy, but I knew the other scouts were having birthday parties to which I was mostly not invited to. My mom tried to encourage other girls at my school to become scouts. I remember her bringing me with her to talk to Elaine's mom. They lived in a poor section of Los Angeles and were Catholic; I recall seeing Jesus figures all over their walls. Anyway, Elaine's family wasn't interested.
I can speak directly from experience of one instance, when I was in 4th or 5th grade; I wanted to learn to play the piano, And when my mother mentioned this to the OT (occupational therapist) the OT said; "Oh, don't waste your money, she won't be able to do it". My mom bristled and said, "Well, Lisa wants to try, so that's what we will do!" So, over the summer, I took lessons, and practiced a lot. My teacher was a woman who had taught blind people to play by having them put their hands on top of hers, to learn how it should feel and look. It worked with me as well, and by the time school began in September, that OT had to eat her words! I was now able to move eight fingers independently and rapidly learned to type on an old IBM using most of my fingers. These days, I use fewer fingers for greater speed and accuracy.
It was the same when I wanted to take horseback riding lessons. This was back in the 60s, before it was widely known that horse riding could improve a child's sense of balance, self-confidence and improve the gait of kids with cerebral palsy. I just knew I loved horses. I had every book I could get my hands on; I loved Black Beauty, I loved all the other stories too. One day the horse I rode got hungry, and broke from a trot, which I was just beginning to learn, into a gallop! I hung on for dear life, as Betsy made her way back to the stables where she launched into her feed bag. My instructor was not far behind. My rear end hurt for a few days after, but by the next Sunday I was ready to go again.
I was also interested in Girl Scouts, because my mom was a life-long scout, and my sister was in a troop. I became a Brownie, and my mom and several other moms were co-leaders. I had a pretty bad scissors gait, and my speech was very poor, but that never stopped me from fully participating in my girl scout troop. I became a girl scoot several years later, and I eventually passed my older sister in the number of badges I earned. I earned fifteen plus the sign of the arrow and sign of the star. There were only two that they had to modify for me; Hiking and Swimming. Instead of doing a full hike, I walked 1/4 of the way. For Swimming, I only had to do two full lengths in a pool with just my mom and Pat Burch my wonderful Irish leader.
Pat knew I wanted to go roller skating, so one day, she came over and put me in all kinds of pillows, and she put skates on me and helped me skate the whole way around my neighborhood. I was elated! I didn't care that I was wrapped in pillows, I was having fun!
BUT there was a time, that made me so mad I cried for days... It was halloween and the troop was going to go to a haunted house, and the people there wouldn't let me go because they were afraid I'd fall and hurt myself. I think that was the first time I actually experienced closed doors, or discrimination by adults first-hand. I wailed for days. My mom understood why I was crying, but hated it and wanted me to stop. She had endured my screams when I was a very sick infant for the first 6 or 7 months of my life.
Despite being a girl scout, I always felt lonely because I was bused to a school for kids with disabilities, so I did not interact very much with the girls in my troop outside of scouts, with the exception of a little girl named Dodie. She was just a wee little thing, yet she tried on my leg braces several times, which were way big on her. I wonder now, what she told her family of me... I know my mom tried to keep me busy, but I knew the other scouts were having birthday parties to which I was mostly not invited to. My mom tried to encourage other girls at my school to become scouts. I remember her bringing me with her to talk to Elaine's mom. They lived in a poor section of Los Angeles and were Catholic; I recall seeing Jesus figures all over their walls. Anyway, Elaine's family wasn't interested.
Friday, March 5, 2010
Standing On The Mountaintop
Standing on the mountaintop,
I see children everywhere,
Being loved and gently nurtured
To become the special people they
Are meant to be.
So, please stop belittling the children,
Stop hitting and abusing your children,
Your sweet, precious children,
Let’s clean the air and land,
Let’s get the chemicals out of our food,
Let’s stop drugging our children with Ritalin.
Let them be healthy and run around.
Some children will be gifted in the arts,
Some will paint the sky green,
Some will be music makers,
Some will build the new paradise cities of the future,
Some will rock the world in science,
While others may lag behind,
If we love and nurture all the children,
Eventually all will succeed,
Standing on the mountaintop of the future,
I see children running and playing everywhere,
Let them play all they want
For it will help them become
The great men and women
They were meant to be.
So, never break a child’s heart,
Never tell them they cannot succeed.
Please encourage all their creativity......
Yes, I’m standing on the mountaintop of the future,
Breathing clean, fresh air, and all around me is
A bustling, golden, new Paradise city.
The water is pure again,
The fresh air sparkles,
And the land is once again healthy.
(C) 2007 Tamar Raine
Standing on the mountaintop,
I see children everywhere,
Being loved and gently nurtured
To become the special people they
Are meant to be.
So, please stop belittling the children,
Stop hitting and abusing your children,
Your sweet, precious children,
Let’s clean the air and land,
Let’s get the chemicals out of our food,
Let’s stop drugging our children with Ritalin.
Let them be healthy and run around.
Some children will be gifted in the arts,
Some will paint the sky green,
Some will be music makers,
Some will build the new paradise cities of the future,
Some will rock the world in science,
While others may lag behind,
If we love and nurture all the children,
Eventually all will succeed,
Standing on the mountaintop of the future,
I see children running and playing everywhere,
Let them play all they want
For it will help them become
The great men and women
They were meant to be.
So, never break a child’s heart,
Never tell them they cannot succeed.
Please encourage all their creativity......
Yes, I’m standing on the mountaintop of the future,
Breathing clean, fresh air, and all around me is
A bustling, golden, new Paradise city.
The water is pure again,
The fresh air sparkles,
And the land is once again healthy.
(C) 2007 Tamar Raine
Animal photos link
If you enjoy photos of animals, here are some from Yahoo that are interesting. The one link is to a Mother sloth and her baby. I don't know why, but almost any photos of babies makes me get all warm and fuzzy! Enjoy!
http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Zoo/ss/events/lf/031802zooanimals/im:/100305/481/d165880a9b3c42df9dbed73db5308a11#photoViewer=/100305/481/bd7e12b89a7247e5a9afe20a293e0adb
http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Zoo/ss/events/lf/031802zooanimals/im:/100305/481/d165880a9b3c42df9dbed73db5308a11#photoViewer=/100305/481/bd7e12b89a7247e5a9afe20a293e0adb
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Please Help Haitians with disabilities
http://www.portlight.org/home.html
There are many thousands of Haitians with disabilities who need our help. Please give what you can.
There are many thousands of Haitians with disabilities who need our help. Please give what you can.
Life isn't a Fairy Tale (Article on Mentoring)
Wake up, my princess, there is no fairy godmother to turn your wishes into reality. Life is not easy and does not always seem fair, but everybody must deal with the cards they were dealt. There comes a time in all our lives when we must say, “Okay, that happened, now am I going to let it control my life, or am I going to take this issue by the horns and beat it?”
In my life I have mentored many people with cerebral palsy, which also happens to be one of my disabilities. Most recently, I mentored a young woman with cerebral palsy. No doubt Linda's family life could have been better. But it is what it is, and I try to get her to see through to the reality of her situation. We could discuss the WHY’s of her life, and discuss HOW people SHOULD treat each other until the sun freezes over, but it would not solve any of her problems. And, certainly, you cannot force anybody to love you. I am a bit like pop psychologist Phil McGraw, in that I like to cut to the chase, rather than sit on the proverbial psychiatrist’s couch and talk for years about what our family did to mess us up.
Now, let me paint a picture; Imagine being very, very intelligent, imagine being forced to go to a day program where many of the people have educational challenges. Imagine your mind does not get properly nourished. Imagine that the reason you are in the day program is solely because you need help going to the bathroom, and your support agency does not want to go to the trouble of hiring somebody so you can attend college… These are all some of the real issues that Linda was dealing with.
I began by telling her I know many people who have found innovative ways around these issues. I also tell her she absolutely has the right to request additional hours. I tell her if her support agency does not help her, she must go to the next level, to the Regional Center case manager. It took a few months, of repeating, over the phone or in Instant Messaging, over and over again, what steps she needed to take. Sometimes my assistant and I felt like a broken record, but she finally succeeded in getting more hours, and she made the decision to stop going to the day program, so she could attend the local college.
Another issue is where she lives. Currently she lives in a house that sits on a road with no sidewalks. She is completely dependent on either taking her own van, which her attendants drive, or taking paratransit, which is unreliable. Otherwise she is just stuck in that house, like a prisoner. There is no just going for a walk, because it would just be too dangerous to ride her chair on the busy road.
There were other things that were going on. I have tried to show Linda that the situation will be awful if she does not move NOW. She knows it will be bad, and she knows if she stays there, without making her dreams real, she will die. Her spirit will die, and she will be very bitter, yet she feels responsible for her grandfather. The difficulty is that all section 8 lists in the area have been closed for years, and her support agency apparently didn’t know about EDEN housing, or below market rate housing, or any of that.
Due to my contacts from sitting on the disability commission for six years, I have been able to dig up resources for her. But, it is up to her to follow through on those resources, it’s not like I have a van and can take her to these agencies for assessments.
Another area we always come back to is how unhappy she was with her support agency. Unfortunately, the agency that supports me has a waiting list 30 people long, because it is the best one in the state. But I happen to know a young man who started his own agency because of his own staffing needs. I have told her about his agency many, many times, and keep telling her to call the guy. For some reason, she hesitates, even though her attendants do not understand why she is so unhappy, and why she wants to go out and meet people and have a social life! They have refused to take her to clubs even though she is 26 years old. So, for many months she has sent me instant messages me about how this one did this, and that one does that. I firmly kept telling her, “Linda, your agency is the cause of most of your aggravation, and your tears, you have every right to fire them, and hire a new agency. You even have a right to change Regional case managers." I don’t know what’s holding her back, I suspect, though, it is fear of the unknown.
I tried to build her self esteem by teaching her some of the principles of rational self-interest. I let her know that it is sad that her sister, whom she practically raised, does not want to spend time with her. I acknowledged that she has a right to feel hurt, but then I said, okay – it looks like you just need to let go, and get out there and make friends with people who do want to be with you.
I told her it is okay to put your needs and desires first; you have every right to take care of yourself. Of course it isn’t right that those of us with disabilities have to fight so hard for what seems so basic a right; the right to pursue our dreams. But after acknowledging that life is hard, and reminding her that nobody promised us a garden of roses, I always push her to continue setting goals for herself. One step at a time, one day at a time, one week at a time, goal setting and strategy continue to be key.
I began by telling her she needs to speak up, and make her wishes known. With each obstacle she encountered, I told her to keep going. I tell her she must continue to speak up, and be forceful in obtaining her dreams. I listen with compassion, but sometimes firm, tough love is needed. She has a tendency to get stuck like a broken record, and ask; “BUT, WHY?” this or that happens. It is at these points I tried to push her beyond the WHY, toward the steps she needs to take to obtain services, or whatever she wants to attain.
I got frustrated with her at times, because she complains about things, but then does not follow up on suggestions I give her. I was talking about it with my assistant, and I said, "You know, I can only do so much, it's not like a fairy tale, I can't just wave a wand and make her problems go away. I'm not her fairy godmother; she has to do some of the work.
We must all do as much as we can do. Maybe what we need to do is become our own superheroes, our own fairy godmother. Just like Glinda told Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, she always had the power within her all along, to go back home. Back in the 70's there was a song called Tin Man, and ever so often I hear a stanza in my head;
In my life I have mentored many people with cerebral palsy, which also happens to be one of my disabilities. Most recently, I mentored a young woman with cerebral palsy. No doubt Linda's family life could have been better. But it is what it is, and I try to get her to see through to the reality of her situation. We could discuss the WHY’s of her life, and discuss HOW people SHOULD treat each other until the sun freezes over, but it would not solve any of her problems. And, certainly, you cannot force anybody to love you. I am a bit like pop psychologist Phil McGraw, in that I like to cut to the chase, rather than sit on the proverbial psychiatrist’s couch and talk for years about what our family did to mess us up.
Now, let me paint a picture; Imagine being very, very intelligent, imagine being forced to go to a day program where many of the people have educational challenges. Imagine your mind does not get properly nourished. Imagine that the reason you are in the day program is solely because you need help going to the bathroom, and your support agency does not want to go to the trouble of hiring somebody so you can attend college… These are all some of the real issues that Linda was dealing with.
I began by telling her I know many people who have found innovative ways around these issues. I also tell her she absolutely has the right to request additional hours. I tell her if her support agency does not help her, she must go to the next level, to the Regional Center case manager. It took a few months, of repeating, over the phone or in Instant Messaging, over and over again, what steps she needed to take. Sometimes my assistant and I felt like a broken record, but she finally succeeded in getting more hours, and she made the decision to stop going to the day program, so she could attend the local college.
Another issue is where she lives. Currently she lives in a house that sits on a road with no sidewalks. She is completely dependent on either taking her own van, which her attendants drive, or taking paratransit, which is unreliable. Otherwise she is just stuck in that house, like a prisoner. There is no just going for a walk, because it would just be too dangerous to ride her chair on the busy road.
There were other things that were going on. I have tried to show Linda that the situation will be awful if she does not move NOW. She knows it will be bad, and she knows if she stays there, without making her dreams real, she will die. Her spirit will die, and she will be very bitter, yet she feels responsible for her grandfather. The difficulty is that all section 8 lists in the area have been closed for years, and her support agency apparently didn’t know about EDEN housing, or below market rate housing, or any of that.
Due to my contacts from sitting on the disability commission for six years, I have been able to dig up resources for her. But, it is up to her to follow through on those resources, it’s not like I have a van and can take her to these agencies for assessments.
Another area we always come back to is how unhappy she was with her support agency. Unfortunately, the agency that supports me has a waiting list 30 people long, because it is the best one in the state. But I happen to know a young man who started his own agency because of his own staffing needs. I have told her about his agency many, many times, and keep telling her to call the guy. For some reason, she hesitates, even though her attendants do not understand why she is so unhappy, and why she wants to go out and meet people and have a social life! They have refused to take her to clubs even though she is 26 years old. So, for many months she has sent me instant messages me about how this one did this, and that one does that. I firmly kept telling her, “Linda, your agency is the cause of most of your aggravation, and your tears, you have every right to fire them, and hire a new agency. You even have a right to change Regional case managers." I don’t know what’s holding her back, I suspect, though, it is fear of the unknown.
I tried to build her self esteem by teaching her some of the principles of rational self-interest. I let her know that it is sad that her sister, whom she practically raised, does not want to spend time with her. I acknowledged that she has a right to feel hurt, but then I said, okay – it looks like you just need to let go, and get out there and make friends with people who do want to be with you.
I told her it is okay to put your needs and desires first; you have every right to take care of yourself. Of course it isn’t right that those of us with disabilities have to fight so hard for what seems so basic a right; the right to pursue our dreams. But after acknowledging that life is hard, and reminding her that nobody promised us a garden of roses, I always push her to continue setting goals for herself. One step at a time, one day at a time, one week at a time, goal setting and strategy continue to be key.
I began by telling her she needs to speak up, and make her wishes known. With each obstacle she encountered, I told her to keep going. I tell her she must continue to speak up, and be forceful in obtaining her dreams. I listen with compassion, but sometimes firm, tough love is needed. She has a tendency to get stuck like a broken record, and ask; “BUT, WHY?” this or that happens. It is at these points I tried to push her beyond the WHY, toward the steps she needs to take to obtain services, or whatever she wants to attain.
I got frustrated with her at times, because she complains about things, but then does not follow up on suggestions I give her. I was talking about it with my assistant, and I said, "You know, I can only do so much, it's not like a fairy tale, I can't just wave a wand and make her problems go away. I'm not her fairy godmother; she has to do some of the work.
We must all do as much as we can do. Maybe what we need to do is become our own superheroes, our own fairy godmother. Just like Glinda told Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, she always had the power within her all along, to go back home. Back in the 70's there was a song called Tin Man, and ever so often I hear a stanza in my head;
“Oz never gave nothing to the Tin Man,
That he didn't, didn't already have....”
It means the Tin Man always had a heart, the Scarecrow always had a brain, the Lion always had courage, Dorothy always had the power to go home, and when they were tested on their journey those things became apparent. The Wizard of Oz is a great, classic example of seekers who go on an adventure, and on the way, discover many things about themselves.
I have always been honest and forthright. I have always been willing to work hard at whatever I set my mind to. I thank my lucky stars every day that I learned to be my own self-advocate from my parents. They went to bat for me, many times. Having cerebral palsy has been hard at times because people always underestimate you. They see the uneven walking gait, they hear the garbled speech, and they make dozens of assumptions, based on what things look like on the outside. Every day I beat down the door and I follow my own path. Those of us with disabilities always have to work ten times as hard just to live an ordinary life.
All I wanted when I was younger was a job. Few were willing to even interview me. That's tough, life isn't fair. I had to deal with the cards I was dealt at birth. I kept trying different things, I didn't give up. I now have my own business. I have told my young friend some of what I’ve had to go through to get what I want and need, so that she can see that persistence does pay off.
My passions are writing, art, and disability issues. I am trying. I am currently in the process of writing a business plan. I never dared call myself an artist before, I now believe I am an artist. I never thought of myself as a businesswoman, either, but now I consider myself a businesswoman. It is not easy. As a business owner, you are responsible for everything. You are responsible for knowing all the nitty-gritty details of the products, marketing, and advertising. It's up to you to run the tests and the numbers. It's up to you to network, to get exposure, all of it. I still can't multiply, but I can look at the stats for my websites and see whether people responded to my ads or not, what search terms they used and so forth. I enjoy the challenges now.
More than ever before, I see that I must be the self-leader. Just like the many young women I have mentored over the last twenty years, I sometimes have to push myself to be more assertive to get what I want in my life. Sometimes you just wish people would do what they’ve promised. You wish you didn’t always have to be the ground-breaker. You wish people would understand what you go through. Sometimes you get weary, and you do want an easier life, and at times wish you had a magic lantern or a fairy godmother to wave her wand and make everything go your way. But of course, as the saying goes, easy come, easy go.
And that is the problem with these fairy tales, with movies, and TV shows; they feed you the idea of no effort - easy money, and set people up to be bystanders in their own lives, and not know it takes a lot of work, a lot of effort to be successful in this world. For some of us, the journey is longer and harder due to physical disabilities, societal prejudices, and accessibility issues, but when we do end up achieving our dreams, and living the life we are meant to live, our successes are that much greater and sweeter.
The thing I tell myself, as I guide Linda to becoming her own best advocate, is no matter what issues come up, the focus is always to be on taking the next step. Isn’t that interesting? The particulars for each individual’s struggle to become the person they are meant to be, may differ greatly, but as long as we all keep taking one more step, and then another and another, until we reach our destination, like the old-fashioned foot traveler. We may decide at any moment to alter our goals, to try something else, to go in a different direction, but as long as we keep moving, eventually we will meet with success. So, when Linda earned an A in her English class, she was so proud of herself, proud because she did it all herself. We just have to keep building on that success. I have no doubt that whatever field she decides to go into, she will be very successful.
My mother really drummed it into my head that life is not fair, but with hard work we can succeed. I appreciate all my mentors for teaching us that the easy way is not the most rewarding, that hard work is good, that finding what we love to do – our passions, will turn hard work into our greatest joy, and thus when we have that downstream focus, work becomes play.
(C) Tamar Raine
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Poem for my dad
To My Blessed Dad
As you soar into the sky,
As you float in heavenly peace,
As you sail the seven seas
On a trade wind’s breeze,
Now you are free.
I reach out among the stars,
But you are not so far away,
Blessed, blessed, blessed man,
You will always be in my heart.
Oh tender romantic man,
Gentle father, loving husband,
You will always be in our hearts,
I reach across the sky,
I look up at the moon and the stars,
How can I say goodbye?
If I could swim the seven seas,
If I could fly into the golden stars,
I would bring you back with me,
But now you are free.
Blessed, blessed, blessed man,
I’ll reach out with my heart,
For you are not so far away,
We’ll find a way one day…
(c) Tamar Raine
For you are not so far away,
We’ll find a way one day…
(c) Tamar Raine
A Lady (poem)
A Lady....
She is a lady fine and true
Her spirit strong and lively,
She has a tremendous heart
And the will to share
With another who is fine and true.
Today as she rode in the afternoon heat,
She knew that she just cannot be beat,
The hot spring air ran through her curls,
As she in her chair, and an aide on a bike did race,
To see her fathers newest embrace.
Her father, a retired psychologist,
said he was quite amazed,
at the romance scammer’s marketing skills,
He’d failed to create his own dating service,
Unable to pay his programming bills.
She thought to herself, dad it’s okay
Most men, I find are really so bland.
Dashing home, she thought of that one,
special man, who had caught her eye,
While talking about mud pies.
She is a lady fine and true
But right now her heart is somewhat blue,
But, don’t worry, this lady
with her strong spirit and giving heart
refuses to give in to the anti-civilization farts!
(c) Tamar Raine
She is a lady fine and true
Her spirit strong and lively,
She has a tremendous heart
And the will to share
With another who is fine and true.
Today as she rode in the afternoon heat,
She knew that she just cannot be beat,
The hot spring air ran through her curls,
As she in her chair, and an aide on a bike did race,
To see her fathers newest embrace.
Her father, a retired psychologist,
said he was quite amazed,
at the romance scammer’s marketing skills,
He’d failed to create his own dating service,
Unable to pay his programming bills.
She thought to herself, dad it’s okay
Most men, I find are really so bland.
Dashing home, she thought of that one,
special man, who had caught her eye,
While talking about mud pies.
She is a lady fine and true
But right now her heart is somewhat blue,
But, don’t worry, this lady
with her strong spirit and giving heart
refuses to give in to the anti-civilization farts!
(c) Tamar Raine
Odds & ends
It's amazing how much the gray days affect me. ugh! But at breakfast this morning, I noted one little red bud on my one hanging plant, and! The trees that only lost its last leaf three weks ago, already has some green sprouting on the branches. So! Spring is on her way! I know we need the rain badly, and I hope that what we've received will help us.
Well, on to perfect the look of this blog!
Mag
Well, on to perfect the look of this blog!
Mag
Friday, February 26, 2010
LIFE...
Sometimes LIFE can throw you a curveball, rendering you like a scrabble game when the tiles get tossed from the box. LIFE for PWD can be full of acronyns; DAC, SSI, SS, Medicaid, Medicare, SOC, Pickles, PASS, overpayments, PT, OT, ST, CP, DD, ADA. We become nothing more than numbers and acronyns to the politicians who don't have a clue as to how hard it is to live on 850.00 a month. And when a governor puts up barriers to his offices so that the krips can't block his front office door, that speaks volumes about our undesirability. For once in their lives those legislative assistants can know for a minute what it's like to have to go around barriers. Folks, we need to kick it up a notch, and let the governor and those who voted for these budget cuts know that the clock cannot be turned back, we won't go back to institutions!
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